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Tue Jun 6 06:52:25 EDT 2006


That tried and tried to write limericks.
They didn't really rhyme,
And were short one line.
(But weren't entirely self-referential.) 
                                    -- Doug Blank
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A couple with bad information
Got into a tight situation.
They said, "We don't see ---
It just cannot be
We only had backpropagation!"
                                    -- Mark Weaver
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To these still stuck in the old school,
The rule is the ultimate tool.
But connectionists know
(The others are slow)
That the rule is a tool for a fool!
                                    -- Tim van Gelder
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These guys Fodor and Pylyshyn
Came to town with a mission.
But they got in a jam
When faced off with RAAM
Instead they should just have gone fishin'.
                                    -- Dave Chalmers
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Said a network that was rather horny
To another, "This might sound too corny, 
Of all of my mates,                                                            
You've got the best weights,                                                   
Let's optimize them until morning."
                                    -- Paul Munro
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Once quoted a young naive RAAM
"In my 3-2-3 mind I can cram
All of human cognition
With minor omission"
But it's not that much better than SPAM.
                                    -- Devin McAuley and Gary McGraw
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In Bloomington, geniuses gather
Working a connectionist lather
Did they solve the world's woes,
Or compound them -- who knows?
It's not a decidable matter.
                                    -- Dave Touretzky
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"Backprop will usually converge,"
Rumelhart and Hinton observe.
"When some people say
`Brains don't work that way'
We just smile and flip them the bird!"
                                    -- Pete Angeline and Viet-Anh Nguyen
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There once was a recurrent node
Who felt he was ready to explode
Without stimulation
Only self-excitation
He swelled up and then shot his load.
                                    -- Devin McAuley and Gary McGraw 
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Pollack has made this admission
Of his neural net's true composition:
"I recursively RAAM it
With symbols, Goddamnit!
So don't pay no mind to Pylyshyn."
                                    -- Dave Touretzky
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Minsky and Papert were cruel
Which gave the symbolists fuel.
Connectionists waited
Till they backpropagated
And now neural networks are cool.
                                    -- Paul Munro
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